Stuck in the Middle

I like to believe that being the middle child has its perks-you get to boss your little sister and still reap the benefits of being a younger sister. Expectations aren't set as high as it is for your "first" born because hey-if you screw up the second one, there is always that third precious child to make the come back and save the family name. So this is me. The middle child. I wouldn't be as harsh to myself and consider myself a screw up in any way...I am referred to as the "special" child. And Damn straight I am special!

I am the tallest of the three, a heaping 5'4". I look nothing like my two sisters and is an artist at heart (went to art school) but I don't like to limit myself to such titles as just an "artist". I am more of a Jack of All Trades..or Jack who can't decide on a trade...

I am grateful for my siblings. Even if I am stuck in the middle. Even if I feel like I have failed in some ways as a sister. My siblings have molded me into who I am: a bit quirky, very sentimental and very indecisive. What I've learned so far being a Middle Sister is that playing the role as little sister and a big sister I am constantly seeking approval from both. I want both to be happy and proud of me. And consequently I strive for that from everyone too. And more often than not at the end of the day I don't really know who I am suppose to be. All I know is that I am fiercely loyal, hate conflicts and live by the motto "Do good and good will come to you" (although I F*ing hate it sometimes) because it seems lately like all the good is sucked out of me like a thirsty newborn and all bad seems to be projecting at me like vomit as a thank you.